workitation: it works!

Is a third of your life or more given over to mindless tasks, meaningless busywork, aimless reorganization of organizations that are fucked in the first place, painful slogging through mountains of drivellous odd chores that seem designed merely to create more odious twiddling by some other misbegotten sod, fucking the dog, so to speak? Then chances are you have acquired that sickly extraneous appendage commonly known as a job.

When you were a child your work was to play and you engaged it effortlessly, with enjoyment (which is just a fancy way of saying with JOY), taking to each thing that was presented to you without questioning whither or wherefor, at peace with that which you were given to do. Many of you may be so ground down, greyed out and inured by that which is falsely called your work that you can scarcely remember those halcyon days. How the hell are you supposed to realize your MAXIMUM POTENTIAL when five days of seven or more are spent reinforcing the trivialization of your heart's desire? Quite simply it's impossible!

Workitation is a subversive program of mental readjustment designed to reconfigure your relationship with work during the course of your existing employment. A finely tuned system of scientifically constructed mantras, devious thought experiments, and undetectable (to the enslaved slave-lords appointed to manage your annihilation) breathing, posture and mental sense-imaging exercises designed to illuminate and magnify those moments of peaceful work that occur in every job whilst muting to a gentle drone all the unpleasant aspects of your hated occupation.

Available for a puny expenditure most likely less than you spend for the fleeting and unhealthy solace of processed snacks and beverages every week, the Workitation Manual is thoughtfully three-hole punched for inclusion in your existing employee handbook or any other standard binder that might suit your fancy. Be forewarned: many who have undertaken the Workitation program report surprisingly rapid rejection of their job environment forcing a bracing leap into the refreshing chill of unknown accomplishments, and some even report experiencing unexpected contentment in discovering the true work in their existing employment. Be careful what you wish for indeed!

klik if you demand tedious explanations of every little thing.