diarism

Neon Genesis Evangelion spins out its incomprehensible and ultimately fruitless plotlines somewhere rather more than just this side of midnight, rolling into daylight once again. I let it play unheeded on television, just a soundtrack, background. I own the whole thing other than the second final movie on videotape, a probably foolish impulse purchase on eBay years ago. It's like a sort of savage shorthand fugue on everything that's right and wrong about anime. The good work Gainax began, brought to completion in FLCL.

But this isn't about that. Just, setting the scene.

For what? Eh. Just one of those nights. A collection of more or less random conditions lead to this, another quiet contemplation, a restless and unsatisfied lull of a moment. I puzzle over these endless archives of relatively ancient history, stuff I wrote as much as eight years ago. The smoker days, the single days, the childless days, all so long ago now. I feel a glum nostalgia for cigarettes but the rest seems like a dream to me now. Was it ever thus? Evangelion segues into Cowboy Bebop. I already rented the whole thing on Netflix. Adult Swim clearly needs to get further ahead of my viewing sophistication.

They play these commercials for "Game Design" degrees from advertise-on-late-night-television type universities: I am briefly sorry for all the slacker stoner gamer pollyannas out there being led to a sad and lying hope about their future lives.

All of which brings me no closer to a resolution of the impulse that started me in the first place. Perhaps by and by after all of the Kingdom Come Institute files are uploaded, this will just adopt the nature of the my old paper journals, and I'll just sit down whenever the urge strikes and heedlessly reel out whatever garbage is floating on the top of my head. Which is not exactly an original direction, but what the fuck. Anyway, there's still hundreds of pages of Kingdom Come yet to come before we start mucking into that territory