Wednesday, September 14, 2005

The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis, the Secret Life of Bob Denver

Among the personal effects of recently deceased actor Bob "Gilligan" Denver was a fifty thousand page handwritten manuscript entitled The Myth of the Island: A Theory of Everything. Apparently written over the course of 30 years, and only finished a few months prior to Denver's death, the massive investigation of science and philosophy opens with R. Crumb's Mr. Natural's totemic proclamation "twas ever thus" and ends "tis well," the final words of George Washington.

Between these enigmatic bookends Denver explores ontology, epistemology, paleontology, astrobiology, exobiology, astrology, cosmology, graphology, cryptology, soteriology, teleology, eschatology, selenology, orology, mythology, synecology, topology, apiology, kymatology, phonology, phrenology, etymology, entomology, formicology, reflexology, campanology, axiology, enigmatology, archaeology, meteorology, speleology, helioseismology, chelonology, carpology, mythology, neurophysiology, sociology, thanatology, doxology, horology, morphology, dendrology, cryology, geochronology, gerontology, herbology, and zymology.

Friends expressed surprise at both the breadth of Denver's inquiries and the volume of his writing. Several noted that for many years he would take to his den for two or three hours most days, ostensibly to "watch television."

"Mostly," stated one friend who wished to remain unnamed, "we just thought he was smoking a little reefer."

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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Heh. I wonder whether they'll publish any of it.

Anonymous said...

Never f*cking mind. I just read the rest of this page. You wackjob. ;p

*adds to favorites*